Experiencing the Father Heart of God – part 2

The role of being an earthly father is extremely powerful…in ancient times, to be fatherless was to be “as good as dead”. There is much wisdom in ancient ways…

Research tells us that a father influences his children in many ways. Most notably a father exerts influence in the following areas:

The intellectual ability of his children,
The behavior his children will model,
The genetic background his children will receive,
His children’s ethnic heritage and their position in the family structure,
The occupational choices his children make,
The material resources his children are left with when he is gone,
The ways his children will behave toward their offspring.

 

1. Studies on a father’s influence on his child’s pro-social behavior reveals that: Even in high-crime, inner-city neighborhoods, well over 90 percent of children from safe, stable, two-parent homes do not become delinquents.

2. Whether the outcome variable is cognitive development, sex-role development, or psychosocial development; children are better off when their relationship with their fathers is close and warm.

3. When both boys and girls are reared with engaged fathers, they demonstrate “a greater ability to take initiative and maintain self-control.”

4. Children with an involved father are exposed to more varied social experiences and are more intellectually advanced than those who only have regular contact with their mother.

5. Attempts to understand the ‘active ingredient’ in father’s play that promotes peer competence have revealed that children learn critical lessons about how to recognize and deal with highly charged emotions in the context of playing with their fathers.

 

Fathers, in effect, give children practice in regulating their emotions and recognizing others’ emotional cues. Teaching adolescents to develop personal and social skills through the cognitive-behavior approach to substance abuse prevention has proven to be effective when facilitated by teacher, counselors and mentors. And we now know that a loving father who remains actively involved has a positive effect on his child’s social, cognitive and intellectual development and self-esteem. Then, logic dictates that a substance abuse prevention program must be designed to incorporate fathers and their influence on their children.

Information is from Drug Free Kids:Why Fathers Make a Difference By Randell D. Turner, PhD
See also: Father’s Unite and Fathers.com

 

Healing Expressive Art Exercise

For our exercise today, do the following:

Assign each of the character traits listed below a numeric rating using a scale between 1 and 10. For example, if you think your earthly father is totally trustworthy, you would write a 10…be totally honest: what does your heart really think/feel versus what you believe a “good son/daughter” should say…

(This exercise can stir up powerful emotions, especially if your earthly father was abusive towards you and/or others; or negligent; or absent through a job that required much travel, through divorce, or through death.  Reach out to a friend before or after you do this work, if needed, to stay grounded and help you process emotions that may get triggered.)

Trustworthy
Affectionate
Engaged
Open/Approachable
Acccepting
Faithful
Giving
Respectful
Just
Communicator
Properly Authoritative
Compassionate
Loving
Understanding
Powerful
Giving of service
Knowledgeable

When you finish, look over your results and record any insights you see. Answer the following questions:

Were there any new revelations concerning your relationship with your earthly father? If “yes”,  jot them down. Is there a truth you sense God wants to lead you into a deeper understanding of? If so, what is this truth and what are you sensing about it?

Now, set this exercise aside until tomorrow…

If you are feeling strong – and have the time – cut some stone shapes out of paper (construction paper, cardstock, scrap book paper, etc). Decide what “size”, “shape”, and color accurately depicts each characteristic as you believe your earthly father expressed it and create that “stone”. Write the characteristic on the front of your stone shapes or print the characteristic name out in a font of your choice, cut them out and glue the words to your stone shapes. Arrange the stones with words on piece of “background” paper (sketchbook pad or piece of construction paper or poster board) or canvas.  Don’t glue them down yet!

(Note:  you should have two sets of character stones now)